What holiday feeling?

Ok, today I am supposed to be packing.

However, the annoyance of the Training Contract search is increasing daily.

In addition to the e-mail saga and the rejection yesterday, I today found out that I've been invited to a second round at Week of Interviews Part II but it is while I am in the US.

Now if one more person asks me if I can cancel my holiday - the answer is NO. It has cost me £2000. Coming back early would cost me another £1000+. Seriously - I'm a student. I've been saving up for this holiday for a year. I HAVEN'T GOT A SPARE £1000!!! Now if the law firm was prepared to refund my costs then yes fair enough, but somehow I dont think a transatlantic flight qualifies as "reasonable expenses".

Perhaps I'm thinking about this all wrong. A lot of people will say "but it's your career" etc. And if it was a matter of flying back/cancelling a week in Spain fair enough, but I physically do not have the money to make this change to my plans. There is no guarantee I would get a TC anyway even if I did come back. I have paid myself sick for this trip and have been dreaming about going since I was 13. I am feeling a bit like maybe I don't deserve to get a TC because I'm not changing my plans to go to the interview - there are so many people out there who would do it at the drop of a hat. There are no words to explain how much I want to be a lawyer but I physically don't have the money or the desire to cancel this trip. I made a conscious effort not to go earlier because the firms were telling me they would interview first week of September but obviously that is not the case. Silly me.

That is now the third application in two days that has gone tits up. I am probably just a bad person and destined to die TC-less and lonely :(