LONDON - 8th June 2007
Today, between 10.35 and 1.35 Hall S5 of the ExCeL centre in London's Docklands gripped by a three-hour crime wave.
Two people were brutally murdered in the street by a male reported to be intoxicated, identified only as "John". Incenced by taunts by the first victim about his infertility, he proceeded to kick the first victim to death. The victim's pregnant wife, shocked by the events unfolding before her, attempted to stop the incident by throwing stones at the attacker, however this merely led to him stabbing her in the stomach with the keys he was carrying on his person. The first victim died en route to the hospital, his wife subsequently succumbed to her injuries after refusing treatment due to her distressed state following the tragedy.
It is reported that potentially over 1000 law students advised the offender to rely on intoxication, self-defence, provocation and dimished responsibility as defences, should he be charged.
In scandalous events elsewhere, three stars of a TV reality show, analogous to the X-factor were also found in a number of compromising situations, attempting to steal various objects
varying from airline tickets to a fellow star's guitar.
A lady walking her dog wreaked havoc at a local pub by going on a rampage resulting in criminal damage, burglary, aggravated burglary, robbery and blackmail. The landlord of the pub said "I am truly shocked. In all my years running a fictional public house in law exams have I seen such audacity."
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Yes you got it. Today was Criminal Law. It's not my favourite but it was ok. EU left on Monday but that isn't even like a proper exam - it's only two hours!
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